Is Homeschooling Right for Me? (6 Reasons It’s Easier Than You Expect)
This post attempts to dispel the myth that “only certain people can homeschool.” The truth is, you could homeschool too, and I’m going to share 6 reasons why it’s easier than you might expect. Homeschooling encouragement for beginning homeschoolers!
It is a truth universally acknowledged that homeschool families cannot travel anywhere in public during a school day without attracting unsolicited comments from strangers. To be fair, it happens less frequently since Covid, but it’s still common. There are the people who love to state the obvious: “You’ve got your hands full!” There are occasional sincere questions: “Are you guys off school today?” or, “Are they all yours?” There are the Ones Who Clearly Think We’re Out of Our Minds But Won’t Say it Out Loud: “Oh, you homeschool. Ahhh. Hmm. Interesting.”
Or, one of my personal favorites, “Are they all from the same dad?”
(Firstly, it’s none of your business. Secondly, it’s none of your business. Thirdly, YES.)
Most of these I believe are well-meaning and we generally laugh them off and continue on our day; but the one that bothers me a bit is the people who say “Better you than me!” or, “I could never do that!”
I don’t like the assumption that I am somehow special (I’m not) or the assumption that it’s torture to be with one’s children all day (it’s not). I would love to respond to these strangers with a long lecture about how exactly they COULD homeschool their children and how it would be much more ENJOYABLE and much less trouble than they think it would be, but I can’t/won’t/probably shouldn’t. Instead, I keep my thoughts to myself until the day when I can write them down and share them with the internet world.
Dear Well-Meaning Stranger In The Grocery Store, whether or not you ever find and read this, I dedicate this post to you. Yes, you could homeschool, and here’s why.
Hopefully Unnecessary Disclaimer:
Yes, I know that there are thousands of excellent reasons – whether related to finances or health or job situation etc – why homeschooling might not be the right fit for your family. My argument here is not that you should homeschool, but simply that if you wanted to, you could.
Why You Could Homeschool Too
Homeschool is efficient and you don’t need to spend all day on it.
If your only frame of reference is public school, I would guess that an outsider envisioning a homeschool day would imagine kids sitting quietly in antique desks in a Pinterest-worthy school room, busily writing notes while Mom lectures on various topics from 8am to 3pm, with a few breaks for workbooks or lunch or a spontaneous spelling bee.
However, the fewer kids you are working with, the faster it goes, so even if I were trying to recreate the same style of education as the public school (I’m not), if I have only a fraction of the number of children in a normal classroom (I do), we would get through the exact same material in half the time (or less). Here’s a more realistic picture of a homeschool day: we read together from a few good books on different subjects, talk about them, do a bit of memory work together, the older kids go off and do some independent work, Mom helps them sporadically as needed, the younger kids do some phonics work or math games, and everyone’s done by noon.
Don’t imagine that you would be sitting with your child all day long, or that you would spend any significant time grading or prepping lessons. Of course you could if you wanted to, but most homeschooling families finish before noon without a problem. Please remember that…
Homeschool is NOT public school and you do not need to be a “teacher.”
You do not need to create your own curriculum. You do not need to invent interesting lectures and amazing science experiments. You do not have to plan activities to hold your child’s attention for every moment of every day. You certainly can, if any of those sound fun to you, but you don’t have to because there is an actual internet world full of people who have already done these things and are more than happy to sell them to share them with you.
You’ll be better off accepting the fact that you are NOT going to be able to recreate a public school classroom, and that what you CAN offer your child is something much better: an atmosphere of love, curiosity, learning for the sake of learning, a flexible schedule, and their biggest cheerleader (you) with them at every step of the way. Speaking of cheerleaders…
You’ve been teaching your child since they were born; it’s not that hard to just keep going.
You may think you can’t “teach” your children when it comes to multiplication or phonics, but who taught them how to use a spoon? Who taught them to make their bed, to get dressed, to look for cars before crossing the street, or to mix up cookie dough? You did! The most effective teaching comes from a loving relationship, not a college degree. Public school teachers may need extensive training in order to manage a classroom, but you do not need a degree in order to teach your child subtraction.
Yes, there are absolutely some people who are more gifted at teaching than others: people who can break down complex subjects into simple steps, who can capture attention with a few well-chosen words – and that may not be you! That’s okay. You and your spouse are the two people in the whole wide world who care most about your child and know them best, and this more than makes up for what you may lack in teaching skills. Furthermore…
A good book or curriculum will teach both you AND your child.
No need to worry if you don’t remember algebra or Ancient History or sentence diagramming or the parts of a cell. If homeschooling were limited to those parents who did, it would be a very small group indeed – and I would not be part of it. Many curricula provide actual scripts for the parent/teacher (as in, “say this first, and then this”), many are “open and go” (i.e. no planning or prep work required), and absolutely NO prior knowledge is needed in order to read an excellent, interesting book and then talk about it together.
If you feel you are not a natural teacher yourself, then buy a curriculum or a book written by someone who is! I don’t think many parents go into homeschooling with the hope that it will be a second education for themselves, but almost all find that it is true. And what a lovely surprise that is! It’s perfectly normal and even healthy for your children to see you learning new things right along with them. In fact, when learning new things…
You don’t need to and shouldn’t go at it alone.
I mean this both in the sense of community/friendship and in the sense of teaching every subject yourself. Within 20 miles of my house I know of at least 7 homeschool groups with regular meetups, classes, or even sports leagues. Homeschooling grows in popularity each year and if you look for it, I am certain that you will find other like-minded families to befriend. Furthermore, if you are intimidated by a particular subject, there are more resources for outsourcing it than ever before.
Between online classes/tutoring, homeschool co-ops, public school classes (generally homeschoolers can take a couple for free), or even just a helpful spouse/friend/family member, it’s definitely possible to find someone to help you out. And if you’re worried about how difficult it might be to have your kids home all day, just remember that…
Having your children gone all day at public school is not necessarily easier.
I remember once chatting with the parent of one of my piano students and telling him that we were thinking about homeschooling our (then) three-year-old. He looked shocked and quickly told me not to do that, because “You’re going to need a break from your kids!” Now, yes, I certainly do sometimes need a break from my kids. And that is not wrong, and I am glad to get breaks!
However, I am offended by the view that sees children as a nuisance and a bother, to be shunted off to some under-paid workers who will keep them out of my sight for as long as possible so I can do something more important. And yes, being with your kids all day every day can absolutely be exhausting, hard work at times; but having them gone all day would be hard too.
It would be harder to find time to chat with them and harder for the siblings to play together and we would have fewer shared experiences and it would be harder to squeeze in all the books I want to read aloud together.
It would be hard to get us all out the door every morning and stay on top of homework and paper work and hard to have our yearly schedule dictated by a school.
In fact, maybe we should all just agree that no matter how you cut it, no matter what choices you make, raising kids is often hard!
But if you’re interested in homeschooling, you can choose your hard and then find ways to make it a little easier or more sustainable. You can work on character issues and obedience so that your children are more pleasant to be around. You can incorporate more outside time so that everyone gets a little breathing room and space from each other. You can pray, and pray, and pray some more for wisdom in navigating tricky sibling relationships.
I am not saying homeschooling will always be easier, but it also won’t always be harder.
Homeschool still may not be the right choice for your family, and I respect that. But I would love to convince you that homeschooling is not as hard as you think, and that if you wanted to do it, you could. Dear Random Lady in the Cereal Aisle, I believe in you!
And who knows? You might end up discovering a lifestyle of learning for the whole family.
“A lifestyle of learning begins at home – with parents who create a context that is welcoming of children as they are and that offers them happy experiences, accessible tools, and parental involvement.” ~ Julie Bogart, The Brave Learner
I’m hoping to homeschool my kids someday and sometimes I feel discouraged before even starting.. thanks for the encouragement!
you’re very welcome! You definitely could do it! 🙂
As a homeschooler of two soon to be three children (and 5 children in total so far) I feel this post!!! Thank you for sharing this!!
You’re so welcome! Glad it was encouraging!
I love reading your posts. My kids are currently 7 months and 21 months old, and I plan to homeschool them. Though sometimes I wonder how I will fit it into my day, seeing as some days are so full already with chores and cooking and nap time routines.
thank you for reading!! The good news is that when your kids first start “school” it’s very short and very simple – and as they get older, and as you get more comfortable, you can gradually add more in. 🙂